The place of being single is viewed by many as either a curse or a blessing depending on where you are going, where you have just come from and most of all what you are planning to do next.

I have read many book on being single, books on the net step on court ship vs dating, and then there are the rules.

all have bits and piece to offer in your next relationship. Advice that will either to gerntee you someone that adores you or someone that is just good at keeping up princesses

Where do you find mr. or miss right for you? many in christian circles tell you to pray and get busy about gods work, be ex-streamly clean and happy about everything even if you are hurt on the inside .. never talk about what you really want because that will scare everyone away.
Never talk about Love and play hard to get.

the games of relationships have their good points and their bad points.
Maybe this forum can be a place where we can talk about the ups and downs of being single and what to do next. If the goal is to get married .. then maybe we need to find out what that will take and start acting like we are that kind of material.

Being women of God requires more than just being a women after Gods own heart, we are to also allow God to prepare us for the next step in Gods integrity and charter.

Sarahw

I think being single, and being a Christian single are basically the same. You want to meet someone, and hope you do.

The differences would come in where you meet that person, and in the amount of faith that you have that God will let you know when you met that special someone.

Being single myself, I have faith that God will allow me to meet the one for me, but I also believe I need to make an effort and go out and interact with people so that I'm available to meet the special someone.

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For me, being single is the only way to go, whether I be a Christian or not. After seeing sooooo many marriages in which the couples couldn't seem to get along no matter how much they tried, and those marriages fell apart inside of 4 or 5 years, and seeing how my mum and step father's marriage was so rocky throughout the time they were married. It didn't help much that my step-father was not a Christian and had no desire to become a Christian, and belittled mum and I for being Christians... I came to feel that for me, marriage would be a very miserable existence, and would most likely be short lived, due mainly to incompatibility with whomever I happened to be married to. I also feel that if married, I'd be like a wild animal in a cage, always trying to find a way of escape. So, I decided I'd be better off remaining single for life.

Well.i think marraige is a good thing.so is being single.they are both phases in life that God wants us to encounter except if u ar called specially for a celibacy ministry(which is rare).2 ar better than 1(ecc4vs9-12).bt being single is nt a time for amxiety,bt a time to develop 1self,in al areas.i believe that if we wait 4 Gods instruction he wil lead us 2 d right partner.

I'm glad to read in the messages above that asking God for guidance is mentioned.However waiting for God to repeat instructions that are already in the Bible can take an endless amount of time and in fact may never occur because we are expected to read the instructions for ourselves.

The Apostle Paul repeatedly taught that Christians should never get married unless they could not control themselves sexually.His teaching was different from Jesus' teaching only in that he did not threaten people if his instructions were not followed.

Luke 20:34-36 (King James Version)

34And Jesus answering said unto them, The children of this world marry, and are given in marriage:

35But they which shall be accounted worthy to obtain that world, and the resurrection from the dead, neither marry, nor are given in marriage:

36Neither can they die any more: for they are equal unto the angels; and are the children of God, being the children of the resurrection.

Marriage is also in the instruction book as you call the bible.
Please note that If you are called to be single it is a calling. Marriage isn't treated as a bad thing. Marriage is celebrated. Marriage is something that God gives his children as a gift. As far as being married makes you less holy or less spiritual or better yet less of a man or women of God .. where ever you got that craze idea. Please find the number of single people celebrated in the bible. They are very few.

I am not starting an argument. I am just saying that being single has its time and place just as marriage has its time and place.

I've been single for (what feels like) forever. Initially I felt it a curse, but as I've (often reluctantly) traveled the journey, I have discovered some precious gems of truth along the way:

(1) You are going to meet that someone special when God knows it is time and both of you are ready. So instead of being busy looking for husband, rather get busy with God, allowing Him to make you the man/woman you need to be for the partner that He has planned for you.

(2) However long (or short) you wait to meet that special person is time that you will never have over again - even after you've met the guy - it will be lost to you forever! Make sure you live it to the full for who you are right then, and with whatever you DO have!

(3) Use the precious time to get to know yourself - what God has put in you that is special to offer in relationships, and also what you want from someone else in relationships. It is not true that another person completes you. Your best chance at a successful relationship (and later marriage) is for two WHOLE people to come together. As you become more whole, you also realize that you're not prepared to settle for a 'broken other half'.

(4)Don't know about other singles, but I've come to love that I have more time with God when there's no one else around, and through the years Holy Spirit has become tangible in my home. My loneliness disappeared the more I had of Him in my life, and I've realized that NO MAN can ever take the place of that - even when I meet 'the one'.

(5) I don't think that marriage makes you less spiritual, but I do think that the added responsibility makes it more challenging to have intimate time with God than when you're single and you don't have those to focus on. Life, in many ways, are more simple when there's fewer people involved. I agree that there is a time and season for everything - and that God also wants us to enjoy marriage and family life - so make sure that you enjoy your single time, so that you are ready to embrace the season of marriage when it comes.

(6) I also used to quote the scripture about "two is better than one", but over time the meaning of this has changed for me. I've realized that 'two' does not have to mean marriage partner. Jesus also sent the disciples out two by two - they were most certainly not married - and God has added some special friends to my life that have each fulfilled different needs of my person for being social and being in relationships. God most certainly made no person to be an island. It is ok to need other people to an extent, and God wants us to enjoy relationship with others the way He intended it, and to allow ourselves to be loved.

I believe that if it is God's plan for you to be single (never getting married) He will give you the grace to do it - and you might very well find that you're so fulfilled with whatever else He gives you to do that you won't feel a hole in your life, dreading every moment and dying of loneliness. I don't believe it will be 'kicking and screaming'. Always remember that God loves you! He wants for you to be happy!

(7) Cherish your good friendships - try to make the close ones other people who share your love for the Lord - even when you meet Mr Right he will still be a man and you still a woman (or vice versa). Your marriage partner was not designed to fulfill your WHOLE person - your husband can never be a best girlfriend who knows about tampons, labor, shopping, etc. (just like there are certain things a woman can never do / be for her husband, no matter how much she loves him.)

(8) Always remember to be WELL BALANCED! This is a golden rule for victorious living!

(9) Don't ever measure your worth as a person in whether or not you are married. One person meeting that special someone, or you being (and sometimes staying) single (for a long time) is not God's punishment for your having done something wrong, or something being wrong with you - neither has anyone 'arrived' when they do meet the right guy. Every person's life is an unique plan - an unique blue print that God has dreamed for each of us. For everything under the sun there is a time and a season. Don't ever compare, and when you've met HIM, don't think you know it all. Focus on enjoying every bit of scenery along your own journey, and trust God for when it will be the right season in your own life and journey.

Remember, it is better to be single and happy, than being in a relationship that is either not God's best for you, or being in it for all the wrong reasons. Rather desiring to be in God's will for you will cause you to be able to enjoy the bliss of both worlds as and when God sees it fit.

I grew up looking at the marriages that surrounded me and thought, "Thank God I'm single!" Then God send a precious friend my way. They love the lord, and is far from perfect, but they know how to love with God's love, and I thought, "God, I would like to be married like that!" If you've never seen a good marriage (not perfect - good), ask God to show you one. It might just change your life, as did it mine, whose parents were divorced when I was four years old. God has renewed my perspective by letting me look through His eyes. He can do the same for you!!

I'm single and I'm happy - thank God - but I'm also looking forward to the marriage and family that I believe that God has in store for me. In the meantime, I'm lovingly and submissively growing towards it and God - all for His glory!!

I have seen a number of marriages and none of them are perfect. In fact, the orthodox rites for marriage include a martyrs crown in the procession. While belittling the partner (in any relationship) is not acceptable, the strongest bonds I have had privilege to witness are between two imperfect people who made a promise and work daily with a long view in mind. Not to discount the single life (Lord knows mine is busy enough), but I had to accept that it is really okay for me to desire marriage. Nothing is risk free, only risks better known. My biggest challenge in any relationship is me, which, by coincidence, is the only think I can control. Good thing, eh?

I agree.. we really need to build .. build more relationships and enjoy our life to the fullest...Finding what we can do until LOVE
FIND US...GOD BLESS!

I have never enjoyed being single. As far as I can recall I have always had a woman in my life since the age of 18. Except for a few months this year, i have been with someone, be it in a marriage or not. I dont believe that God can provide the same sort of company that another human being can. When I have been alone, God has not been there to give me a hug or tell me he loves me. I know he loves me from reading the bible but only another person can make the words audible.

Nice

Wild_Elixir

<swats fly>